Wedding RSVP Etiquette: What to Do When Guests Don’t Respond
- berriesandbloomsst
- 3 hours ago
- 3 min read
You’ve sent your invitations, your stationery looks beautiful, and now… you’re just waiting on those RSVP cards to come rolling back in.
Except—somehow—it feels like half your guest list missed the memo.
If you’re staring down your RSVP deadline and still waiting on responses, don’t panic! This happens to almost everyone. Here’s what to do, when to follow up, and how to keep things running smoothly so your wedding planning doesn’t fall behind schedule.
Set a Realistic RSVP Deadline
When setting your RSVP date, aim for 6–8 weeks before your wedding — especially if you’re incorporating custom signage, specialty printing methods, or detailed assembly work into your stationery and day-of pieces.
That extra time between your RSVP date and the wedding date is what allows you (and your vendors) to move through the rest of the design process with ease for wedding signage. Custom designs for signage often take longer to produce, especially when factoring in rounds of revisions, specialty printing methods like letterpressing, or time-consuming assembly work (think hand-painting acrylic, or gold-leafing).
You’ll also need to allow time for production, shipping, and safe delivery of your signage and stationery — ideally having everything in-hand 1–2 weeks before the wedding so you’re not scrambling at the last minute.
Start Following Up Right Away After the RSVP Date has Passed
If your RSVP deadline has come and gone, don’t wait another week before reaching out! The first day after the deadline passes, start making contact with anyone who hasn’t responded.
Time is oh so precious in the final stretch of wedding planning, and each day matters when you’re trying to finalize seating charts, escort cards, place cards, and catering counts.
Split up the list between you and your partner, or enlist help from your maid of honor, parents, or your wedding planner to reach out to people directly. A quick text or call is perfectly fine — something like:
“Hey! Just checking in to see if you’ll be able to join us for the wedding. We’re finalizing numbers this week and want to make sure you’re accounted for!”
Short, friendly, and straight to the point. And don't be scared to give them a secondary deadline (like the "this week" stated above in this example) so they know they need to respond promptly.
Keep Track of Responses Digitally
If you used physical RSVP cards, be sure to update your guest list in a digital tracker or spreadsheet as responses come in. This will make it easy to see, at a glance, who you still need to hear from and help avoid double messaging anyone.
(If you’re using a wedding website with RSVP functionality, even better — you can cross-check names quickly and keep all your guest info in one place.)
Don’t Take It Personally
It’s frustrating, but it’s rarely intentional! Life gets busy, cards get misplaced, or people simply forget to drop them in the mail. Stay polite, and keep things lighthearted when you follow up.
Your guests will appreciate the gentle reminder — and you’ll feel better knowing you can move forward with accurate numbers and a clear plan.
Getting your RSVPs in on time is about more than headcounts — it’s what keeps your stationery production, signage, seating details, and overall wedding planning timeline running smoothly.
So set a smart RSVP deadline, follow up quickly, and stay organized. With a little proactive communication, you’ll have all your answers in hand and can get back to the fun part — celebrating!